The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
