Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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