why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
