It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
