Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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