what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize