Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
