Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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