What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
