I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Congratulations! We have a period
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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