things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
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