I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Randomize
