Your mouth is God's brothel.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
