Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
