You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
she told me i tasted like america
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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