cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
