i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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