I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Welp...herpes.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Randomize
