I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
