uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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