Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
