i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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