if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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