FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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