I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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