So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
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