1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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