I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I could fuck to npr.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
