Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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