I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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