I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize