god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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