a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
