So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
