whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
