You made me cry and you don't even care
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Dicks are not precious.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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