i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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