and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
