shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
