Someone shit on the floor
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
