She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
We are all done wearing pants today
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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