He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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