You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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