Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Randomize
