would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
