I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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