The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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