im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
In other news, I just burned my penis
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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