This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
