I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
