forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
