yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
We are two peas in an std pod
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
